chaptre 6

The night was somewhat pleasant, though it seemed that it was chill till the bones freeze. The bar was swarmed with people coming and going. But you were never one of them. I kept looking at the door, hoping for your arrival. I still have one too many questions lingering on my mind. I wanted to ask you why you kissed me that night. But you ran away after that, leaving me as clueless as I can be.

“wai’in’ on sumone I s’pose?” I was startled when the manager approached me from behind. He gave me a peculiar look in his eyes. As if he knew something I don’t.  Samuel pretended to wash the glasses but I knew that he was listening. That pair of ears of his was twitching to hear exciting gossips to be passed around.

“Nobody I guess”. I said, paying not much of attention to him. But I kept glancing to the door of course.

“Ri’ ‘en. I believ’d ya,” he said with a chuckle. How amusing. It seemed that my anxiousness was making it a fun scene for him.

“Ka-chink”.

I looked up at the door. There you were. With Adam. Of course. And another man. The man was from the party. What was his name? Gemma?

“Hey, haven’t seen you for a while, Jo,” Adam said cheerfully.  Did you told him about that night?

“You seem rather happy. Are you getting marry?” I pour them their glasses of drink. Glancing at you, it was obvious that you were avoiding my eyes. I let out a little sigh.

“Hey, I can’t be happy when I come here to see you?” Adam pouted. I wished it was you who said those words and showed me that kind of expression.

“Erm, your handkerchief. I forgot to return it to you. Don’t worry. I’ve washed it.” You said hesitantly. I looked at the handkerchief you handed to me.

“He’s been keeping it safe for you,” Gemma joked.

“No I’m not,” trying to protect yourself I see. I smiled with a heavy heart.

“That’s okay. You can keep it.”

I turned around and walk to the door and grabbed my coat.

“Samuel, I’m going out for a while”.

“What? Who’s gonna help me when you’re gone?” Samuel was making a face, trying to make me sympathetic as always.

“I’ll buy you a cake that you like when I get back, kay,” I smiled emptily. That seemed to cheer him up as he was smiling from ear to ear.

“Can I come along? I want to buy you something as a thank you,” Gemma begged. I took a glimpse of you. You were looking down at your drink. Why can’t it be you that ask this?

“Suit yourself,” I said finally, walking out the bar and leaving Gemma behind.

We had a quiet walk. None of us knew what to say. I do appreciate the silence from my company, but this just felt a little odd. I gave a momentary look to Gemma and caught him staring.

“Is it so fun to stare?” I kept my gaze at the front. But I could tell that Gemma’s face was red.

“Sorry bout that.”

There was a silence again.

“So, you’re a girl, huh?” what an interesting topic to start a conversation.

“Figured it out by yourself or somebody told you?”

“Adam did.” Adam huh? So he knew. Sharp mind I see. Another big bonus thrown into the package. Gemma went on when I didn’t give him any respond. “I was surprised at first. Cause you can overthrow a man three times bigger than you”.

“I was lucky”. If that man wasn’t drunk, it would be a problem for me too.

“But still, you were so cool back then. Too bad you’re a girl. If not I would be all over you.” So he was the same as you. Figured that much.

“So, why was that man attack you again?” I tried to divert the conversation, leaving you out of it. It seemed too painful to talk about.

“That bastard!” Gemma seemed filled with hatred. But then again, who doesn’t. “He thinks that he’s all powerful.  He insulted our job… no, waits… my job as a host. He said that we sell our bodies just like a prostitute. The difference, he said, is that we dressed nicely. Like a high class prostitute. I will not take such insult!” with a mope, he crossed his hands.

I chuckled at his reaction. It was rather amusing. So you too were a host? I could never be certain. But I wanted to know more about you. I guess this was my chance.

“So… Erm… how does Adrian got involved?” though I already know the answer. But I couldn’t just pop a question about you without being suspicion now, can I?

“Owh,” he was glowing at the mention of you. He seemed to fancy you. Is he your type? “Adrian tried to pull me away from that bastard when he tried when I tried to fight him. Honestly, can’t he be more civilized? He thinks that his opinions that matters and not others. No wonder he’s a lousy politician. I was just giving him a piece of my mind when he tried to hit me. I managed to dodge though. But then he somehow managed to grab me tight on the wrist. That’s when Adrian showed up. But instead, he was assaulted. All because he was too beautiful. And then you came to the rescue”. 

When Gemma finished his well-put story, he gave me the widest grin. He seemed to sparkle somehow. If this was a cartoon scene, I would definitely see that sparkle clearly.

“I’m just doing what’s right.” Though the real reason was a little farfetched than that. 

“You know, you just made yourself sound cooler. I might change my sexual preference because of you,” he said with a serious face, though I doubt that he was serious about it. I didn’t know what to say so I just smile while giving a shrug. Thanks to his talkative personality, we got pretty well for now.

“You seemed close with him.” I still wanted to know more about you. Forgive me for finding out this way.

“Who? Adrian? Of course. He’s my boss. He taught me everything about work. Too bad he’s straight though. If he’s not, I would definitely want to be hold by him.”

Now Gemma was just looking silly. With that dazed expression he wore gave me the creep. Wait. Did he say you were straight?

“Hey, you okay? Is there something I said?” Gemma looked panicked when I stopped at my tracks, giving him a stare blank. So you’re not gay? I’m not delusional, right? Is it okay for me to have my hopes up? These thoughts were swarming in my head. I felt like turning around and ran to you. My head just couldn’t take it anymore.

“Adrian… straight?” I guessed uttered it out loud when I saw the expression on Gemma’s face changed.  But then he smiled gently. Had I amused him, or did he just pity on me for being an idiot?

“Well, anyone would mistake him for being a gay, given how he appears. Even I was once. But he told me straight out that he’s gross at being touched by a guy.” Gemma gave me a sorrowful look. I pitied him. It must have been hard for him to be accepted by the stereotypical community. We took a break and sat on the rail of the nearby park. Gemma was sitting next to me, still with that sad face of his.  I reached for his curly, brunette hair. It was soft. And I played with it a little. He looked at me. And I smiled.

“Hope you don’t mind. Old habit dies hard”.

“But I wonder if he’s okay though,” Gemma continued. He let me played with his hair. Since he was taller than me, it was quite hard to play it for long, and my hand was starting to ache. So I let go after a while.

“What do you mean?”

“You know, he has this phobia of women right? That’s when I thought he was gay.”

“Your point is?”

“I wonder if he will ever get a partner.”

I looked at him questioningly. Looking at his flushed face, I wonder if there is some agenda behind his words.

“Well, he got Adam to take care of him, right?” I lighted a cigarette. Smokes were coming from my mouth. No different than I was talking, or breathing for that matter. The weather is too cold. But my body felt so hot. Did seeing you with others bothered this much?

“True. He’s Adrian’s uncle after all.”

“Uncle?” I couldn’t tell you how much surprise I had ever since we met. And it didn’t seem to end.

“Yeah. After his mother died, Adam took him in.”

I let out a sigh. Then I started to laugh. And Gemma looked at me incredulously.

“Did I say something funny?”

“No. quite the opposite actually.”

He still a little puzzled by my words, but I let it be. I have no time to think about him. My head was filled with you. Always had been ever since the day I met you.  Looks like I need more time to really get to know you.

“Gemma.”

“Hm?”

“Let’s go back. We’ve walked long enough.” I longed to see you. I would take my time getting to know you. Little by little, please let me in to your world without having to break down the walls around you. Let me use the door to see what was waiting when I’m with you.

Suddenly, the world seems more beautiful than yesterday.